Being an author is like being in charge of your own personal insane asylum.

- Graycie Harmon

Monday, November 15, 2010

Aaaaand Still Editing

I cannot wait until I can write about something else!

The happy news is, however, that I only have 100 pages left to edit in the second round of editing.

The unhappy news is that after I'm done this round, I have to write a synopsis. I'm making a face right now.

The unhappier news is that after writing the synopsis, I have to go back and edit all over again.

After that, I will be submitting the story, and I can forget about it until March. Those who are short-listed will be informed in March of next year (the winner announced May following). If I don't hear from the competition in March, it means I didn't make the short list. That, in turn, will mean one of two things:

1) The story was utter rubbish, or,
2) The story was good, but there were at least 6 other stories that were better.

To protect my fragile ego, I intend to pretend the latter if I do not make the short list. Chances are slim. Guaranteed the competition is going to be tough.

Sorry! I have someone who gets mad at me every time I try to be realistic. So, for his sake:

"I'll take you all on, and I'll WIN! Even if I'm full of arrows!"

Aaaaand back to reality.

If you're not interested in my life beyond my writing, stop reading................... now!

My birthday was Sunday. Thanks to everyone for their kind wishes yesterday. It was a lovely day. I spent it almost in entirety with my father. We went for a Yum Cha brunch. Here in Canada, Yum Cha is called Dim Sum. If I recall correctly, Dim Sum refers to the dishes eaten at Yum Cha. I'll have to check with my Sifu again.

I also saw my flatmate for the first time in over a week. She had a hellish week, and it was nice to just chill with her for a while.

Most of my friends were away at a training/sparring workshop in Toronto, and I'm not really the party-hearty type in any case, so I didn't go out for my birthday. However, P.M. did drop 'round Saturday and delivered some tea. Tea, by the by, is an awesome birthday present! The only thing that beats tea is, perhaps, a book.

I had another small breakdown Saturday afternoon before P.M. dropped by. It was the typical "what am I doing with my life?", could've-driven-me-to-drinking kind of breakdown. Unlike the major quarter-life crisis I experienced shortly after my 25th birthday, this one lasted only a few minutes before I laughed at myself.

It is hard, though; trying to make it as a writer, not making it (yet), and not really wanting to do anything else. All sorts of doubts creep in. What if I don't make it? What then? Will I have wasted my life on an impossible dream? Am I going to end up old and alone, with nothing for company but a pile of unwanted manuscripts?

It all sounds crazy and melodramatic to the outside eye, I can imagine. Still, these thoughts do occur. It's something every person who seeks to make a career out of being creative goes through. Only when you've been faced with countless rejections that continually tell you that what you've got to offer isn't wanted can you possibly understand the crazy melodrama that people such as myself must grapple with.

And I haven't been at it for that long - a little over a year. I can't imagine how people with years and years of this stuff must feel!


O.K. That's enough depression for one morning, thank-you! Today is my Kung Fu brother's birthday. So a big shout-out to K.C.! Happy birthday, bro!

With that, I must get back to catching up on everything and try to finish the second round of edits today. Have a wonderful Monday everyone (especially you, K.C.)!

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