Being an author is like being in charge of your own personal insane asylum.

- Graycie Harmon

Friday, May 21, 2010

Why Am I Sad?

This might bring some of you down, so if you were hoping for a cheery me this morning, stop reading .... now.

I almost burst into tears on my way to work this morning. I'm not quite sure why. It's a beautiful day out - bright sun, warm, with a cool breeze. Absolutely gorgeous. I slept well last night. I cuddled the kitties this morning. I went to training last night, which usually lifts my spirits.

Even so, today I am feeling really down. Might it have something to do with another rejection I received yesterday? Oh, that bothers me a little, and I'm frustrated as hell, but it shouldn't be enough to dissolve me into a puddle of tears. The straw that broke the donkey's back, perhaps?

My flatmate's birthday party is this evening, and we're expecting all sorts of great company. The prospect of a social gathering involving copious amounts of laughter usually cheers me, but all I want to do is curl up in bed and hide from everyone right now.

Right, this is unacceptable! What the hell is wrong with me? I shouldn't be moping around like this. It's stupid. Operation 'cheer myself up' is now in effect:

1. I have a really cool university degree.
2. I have a really awesome job that lets me pursue my dreams.
3. I have a really awesome flatmate.
4. I have two really adorable, if destructive, kitties.
5. I've written 6 full length novels in the span of 3 years.
6. Strangers everywhere have been so kindly offering their time and expertise to help me out.
7. Everyone I know who has read my stuff loved it... (I'm not even going to let the thought that they just might have said they loved it to spare my feelings enter my head).
8. I have an amazingly supportive family whom I adore.
9. I have really amazing friends who are wonderfully kind and generous.
10. I train Kung Fu and Kick-boxing, and that is pretty darn cool.
11. Chemical burns aside, I am NOT a loser.
12. I am pursuing my dreams!
13. I WILL be published!

There, I have no reason to be sad. I'm going to pin this list up on my computer. That ought to remind me just how lucky I am, and help keep the blues away! Have a wonderful long weekend everyone. It is along weekend, so I probably won't post Monday. Back as usual on Tuesday.

Bye now!

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