Being an author is like being in charge of your own personal insane asylum.

- Graycie Harmon

Thursday, February 10, 2011

A Comedy of Errors, or, My Bloodied Foot

Good morning!

Have you ever had one of those days? You know, one of those days, where nothing goes right and things just get so absurd they become funny?

Well, that was the passed twelve hours for me.

After training on Wednesdays, the gang from the C.U. location goes out to eat and shoot the breeze. It's a tradition that started last year and emulates the tradition at the A.C. location whereby the gang goes out to eat and shoot the breeze every Thursday after training (the last training day of the week).

That's not the story. The dinner went well, and there were many laughs all 'round. As a side note, I really do adore my Kung Fu family.

The trouble started afterwards. I got home to enjoy some incredibly awesome chocolate cake made my J.M-B. Persephone had an issue going potty and dragged her pooey butt all over the place depositing foul-smelling 'presents' all over the house. I chased up after her to clean up.

Then the laptop, for no apparent reason, took a spill backwards, tipping over the teapot which fell all over the floor. Loose-leaf tea is a pain to clean up. Then a friend, who had also come over for chocolate cake, lifted up the laptop to get it out of harm's way as I cleaned... only to drag a glass off the table and onto the floor.

I was in the kitchen washing off the cloth when I heard the smash.

I burst out laughing. What else could I do? I had come home to enjoy a piece of delicious cake, and spent the night chasing a smelly cat, cleaning up spilled loose-leaf tea, and picking up shards of broken glass.

(By the by, J.M-B., it was a polka-dotted glass.... I'm sorry!)

All I wanted was cake.

With everything more or less settled, I did manage to enjoy my slice of cake, and even sit and chat a while. When my friend left, I chased the smelly cat again, because she still smelled. My suspicions that she hadn't gotten everything clean were confirmed when I tipped her onto her back and had a look.

So I spent the next hour struggling with her in the bathroom, trying to get her butt clean and not smelling quite so bad. She was very resistant at first, but as soon as she figured out what I was trying to do, she relaxed, and even started to purr.

If I can handle a cat, I'm going to be a whiz with a baby!

That putrid task complete, I could finally have a shower and go to bed; and so I did.

I slept like a log. Too much like a log and woke up fifteen minutes later than I should have. Swearing like a sailor, I got ready for work, stepped into the living room to put on my boots and promptly got a shard of glass in my heel.

It was just a teeny tiny shard of glass, but it went in pretty deep. It was also a thin shard of glass, so I couldn't see it. All I saw was the blood. Already late, I had to sit on the couch for a while and fight to remove this teeny tiny, extremely painful piece of glass before I could put on my boots and, oh, walk.

I managed to do it, but was running so late I didn't have time to fetch a band-aid. I threw on my boots and hoped for the best as I ran for the bus stop.

The bleeding has stopped now, thanks for you concern.

So, that was my ridiculous twelve hours.

Tonight our Lion Dance troupe has a performance at a Gala downtown. Hopefully my ridiculous luck has changed for the better, and I won't be bringing down the performance!

Writing, however, has proved much better. I finished my Prologue yesterday, and all I have to write now is my Epilogue. Then Book 3 is finished.


The only issue there is, I will have to wait until next week (payday) until I can celebrate properly. However, I'll be done another book and will only have to write two more for the series to be complete.

Then I'll have to edit like mad, but I think I'll give myself a break before I go back to that particular story.

Well, this is a ridiculous post. I'll leave off here with today's Forgotten English:


Thirsty. The puckfyst is a dried toadstool. Hence, "A feels puckfyst" [means] I feel as dry as a dried toadstool.
- Appleton Morgan's Study in the Warwickshire Dialect, 1900

Don't ask me how, but I knew this one!


Anna L. Walls said...

Once was the time when cowboys would go to great pains to ensure that their boots remained upright unless they were on their feet. The reasoning was to keep assorted biting bugs such as scorpions from taking up shelter in the nice warm boot during the night. I always thought that was a good idea, but I guess keeping your boots upright can have it's drawbacks. I hope your sock coming away didn't open you cut again.

S.M. Carrière said...

You're a hero for reading all that.

We do the same in Australia, as there are many nasty creepy-crawlies scuttling about.

My cut has remained closed, thanks!

KuietKelticGirl said...

Wouldn't there be a concern of things dropping into your boot too? I'd be tempted to learn how to keep my boots tightly on so no critters crawled into the boots or onto my toes...

I do hope your 12 ridiculous hours are up. As horrible as it is, it is still a very funny mental image of a cat scooting around the carpet with you chasing after it... You truly had a comedy of errors.

I decided years ago having a cat-proof house was almost the same as a child-proof house; I've got it right down to cabinet locks found in the baby aisle on my lower cabinets to keep my cat out.

Perhaps both good and bad comes in threes... 3 messes to clean up, and three good ends - an end to a ridiculous 12 hours, the bleeding has stopped, and the book is pending completion too.

S.M. Carrière said...

Things dropping in are still a concern, but less so than crawling or slithering in!

My ridiculous luck did wear off. Luckily (I suppose) we have hardwood floors, so the mess was easily cleaned up. Still, it was almost exactly as you imagined it, less the kazoo music!

Our cats are generally quite well behaved. Oddly enough, the broken glass was thanks to a person... ahem, K.C!

My grandmother used to say everything comes in threes. I think she's right!

Debbie Maxwell Allen said...

Sorry about the bad day! Hopefully next week you can celebrate with more cake and a sweet-smelling cat! Congrats on finishing book 3!