I Was a Peruvian Farmer

True story. I was. Yesterday. And you can read about it on Rita's blog here.

As for the declaration that I was going to begin writing ahead of schedule. It's not happening. Pottermore.com has sucked me into a world of make-believe and I am currently trying to master the exact science and subtle art that is potion-making.

Oh, and spell-casting is horribly tricky as well.

When it works, it works well. I wish it would work more often.

Training is going very well. Wednesday nights K.C. and I have started working with the body pads (padded chest/body protectors so we can actually hit each other - getting hit still hurts, by the by. I shudder to think what it feels like with out the pad!). I'm uncoordinated and K.C. is very kindly keeping the drills simple for me. Still, it's wicked fun.

M.D. came over last night. She's in town from Saskatchewan ... or was is Saskatoon. One of those. It was lovely to see her again in any case. She's looking well and she's awesome as always.

Have you seen the Game of Thrones teaser trailer? I have. I can't wait for it to start!

On the subject of T.V. shows, there are two slated to premier soon, and I can't wait to see them. Grimm and Once Upon A Time. It's so wonderful to see faerie tales coming back into story-telling. I'm a huge fan of faerie tales.

Right, nothing else to report, so I'm going to Hogwarts now. Potions starts soon and I don't want Snape to get mad at me...

Nothing's Nest

A nonentity. "He's a nothing's nest."

- G.F. Northall's Warwickshire Word-Book, 1896

Holy Catch-Up, Batman!

Well, I'm back!

This calls for an AC/DC song, doesn't it?

In any case, the Kung Fu workshop was fantastic. There are so many thank-you's I have to extend here it's not funny. If you don't particularly want to read them, then skip ahead a couple of paragraphs.

First of all, a massive thank-you to Sifu Jason Tsou for taking the time to come up from L.A. and train us. There is a wealth of knowledge that he continually and repeatedly shares openly. There are some instructors who jealously guard their knowledge. Sifu Tsou is not one.

Thank-you to my own Sifu, John Hum, for organising the trip - again.

A giant thank-you also to my Kung Fu brother K.C. for organising the room, to my roommates K.C., A.H. and P.B. for being awesome roommates. Seriously, thanks! Another giant thank-you to R.C. for the drive up and back.

To all my Kung Fu brothers and sisters, thank-you for making this a fun, informative and relaxing trip. You all rock the Casbah.

I left early Friday and came home late Sunday. I took Monday off to, uh, recover because, let's face it, Wutan Canada is a bit of a party crowd (though I remained tame). It's a good thing I did, as Monday morning I woke with a killer sore throat. I still have said killer sore throat, but I'm back at work anyway.

Answering the phone is interesting...

Of course, the problem with taking time off is that nothing gets done. With no work getting done whatsoever, one tends to fall behind. And so I have. I'm more than 10 000 words behind target right now, and with all the catching up I have to do, there's no way I'm going to be able to write at all today.

Grr.

On the subject of writing, part 8 of the serialisation of The Dying God went up yesterday (I made damned sure I wasn't late with that!). You can read it HERE.

If this is the very first you've ever heard of my serial, you can do all the catch up reading by following the links I've posted HERE.

While I'm on the subject of The Dying God, I am super pleased to announce that I'm in the process of creating a paperback version - with the illustrations! I received the proof yesterday from Creatspace.com. It all looks good, except for a few errors that surprised the hell out of me. I can't tell you the number of times I've edited and re-edited this manuscript!

I'm in the process of reviewing said proof, then fixing the errors, then fighting with the computer - again - to turn the revised manuscript into a .pdf, to order another proof, to review again to ensure that it's as good as it can be before I approve for publication.

That was my big secret.

I kept it a secret because, well, I wasn't sure it would work out, and I was dubious about my technical ability (trust me, computers and I are not friends), and I was dubious about the quality of the finished product (a doubt that has been adequately assuaged now that I have the proof in hand).

So, reviewing The Dying God & Other Stories is what I will be doing for the remainder of the day. Then I have to somehow catch up on the word count of Puppet Master. Perhaps I'll be all caught up in a fortnight?

Wishful thinking, me thinks!

Wish me luck!

Oh, and before I forget - today's Forgotten English:

Fern-Tickles

Freckles on the skin resembling the seeds of the fern, freckled with fern, quite like small ticks... Ferns are frequently the receptacle of ticks, of which tickles may be considered a diminutive.

- William Carr's Dialect of Craven, 1828.

These are popularly accounted for as the marks made by the spurting of milk from the mother's breast, inevitably occasioned, so that a face may be marred that is "over bonny."

- C. Clough Robinson's Glossary of Mid-Yorkshire, 1876.

Preparing for the Apocalypse

Or, rather less dramatically put, Equestrian Archery lessons.

That's me on Nash. Nash is a bossy mare, but once she gets going, she's very good.

So, Monday evening was the first ever Equestrian Archery lesson of the season. It was cold, wet and generally miserable, so we headed into the arena to train. Nash doesn't much like the arena, so she was a little... uh... bitchy. Still, it was good fun.

The trainees were myself and J.M-B. as the other interested parties found they didn't have the time. My Kung Fu sister N.T. joined us for a gander to see if she might be interested in taking it up.

Neither J.M-B. or myself had ridden for a while, nor had we shot in a while, so this lesson was a reintroduction to riding and shooting. I was on Nash first to warm ourselves both up. And J.M-B was doing this:

Then we switched. J.M-B. did this:

While I did this:

We shot with the thumb release. I managed to give myself a blister without knowing it. The sudden pain in my thumb when the blister tore open alerted me of that fact.

Owie!

Without a plaster handy, I just had to suck it up. I tried shooting left handed. Yeah, that was abysmal. Then we decided it was time to shoot from a canter, and then the fun really began. Now I'm not so skilled that I can nock an arrow whilst riding (yet), but I did manage to shoot the target and hit it. The first pass I shot and missed. The following two passes, I couln't even pull the bow as the arrow kept dislodging. Then on the fourth pass, this happened:

I have trouble keeping my heels down, you can see, but I'll correct that soon enough.

And then it was J.M-B.'s turn:

It didn't take her quite so many passes to get it right.

All in all, a brilliant evening, and I can't wait to do it again! The trainer, Chris Kovach, is fun and easy to learn from. He's also extremely accommodating. He rearranged his schedule to take us on Monday, and will be again to accommodate us on Sunday mornings. It's just awesome fun. I'm so happy to be training with him!

If you're in the Ottawa area, and have the means and the time to get to Kemptville, do go and check it out. Chris' website is here. Check it out. You won't be sorry.

Last night was the first night of Martial Arts training in a couple of weeks. Already achy from riding, it was absolute torture... but so, so good! The last hour of training has been devoted to an exceptionally traditional way of training, and the focus is on Mantis Kung Fu for that hour (our school focuses on Mantis, but also teaches a number of other styles including San Shou, Pi Gua, Baji and Ba Gua. The philosophy is one of inclusiveness and openness to other forms of Martial Arts). It was intense, but so much fun!

Writing wise, I did nothing, of course. I mucked about until late in the day when I decided to start the preliminary spelling and grammar check. I didn't finish it as I had started so late. I might finish it today. I might not. I've given myself permission to slack off.

Right, I'll stop boring you and get on with my day. Here is today's Forgotten English:

Fire-Fanged

Fire-bitten. Spoken of oatmeal &c. that is overdried.

- Francis Grose's Glossary of Provincial and Local Words, 1811

Burnt, overheated, dried; fire-fangitness, the state of being overheated, burnt.

- Joseph Wright's English Dialect Dictionary, 1898-1905

Cheese is said to be firefangit when it is swelled and cracked, and has received a peculiar taste in consequence of being exposed to much heat before it has been dried.

- John Jamieson's Etymological Dictionary of the Scottish Language, 1808

Weekend and Worries

Nice alliteration, no?

With everything all caught up yesterday (I'll tell you about my stupidity later), I can now tell you all about my weekend.

CRAZY!

Saturday was, at least. It was an epic day. Epic.

It started fairly early in the morning (for a weekend day) for me. I left the house at 9:oo am and walked to Chinatown for Lion Dance rehearsal at 10:00 am. There I learnt that our Lion Dance troupe has been invited to perform at the New Year festivities at the city's only T&T (huge, massive, giant Chinese grocery superstore). This is a enormous performance, extremely high profile, with a number of dignitaries present.

Eek!

After the hour and a half practice, we all went out to lunch, as usual. At lunch, I learnt that I could not be in the lion for the performance because I was a girl.

Say WHAT?!

Apparently, tradition dictates that a guy and a girl cannot be in the same lion. It's either two guys or two girls, but not one of each.

You can't see me, but I'm making an angry feminist face right now.

Here's the thing, right - I'm not much of a performer. I get the worst stage fright ever imaginable. I shake and tear up and forget everything. I HATE being in front of people. Only now, I want to be in that lion, dammit! I want in because I was told I can't be in.

I might have a problem with authority...

In any case, the client for whom we are dancing is Chinese, and while he might not be traditional, dignitaries from the Chinese Embassy probably will be.

So, despite this being Canada, and the 21st century, I'm out of the lion. On any other auspice, I'd be thanking my lucky stars. As of now, I'm just mad!

Not mad enough to quit. I like my Lion Dance troupe.

Saturday afternoon, immediately following lunch, I took off to teach Kung Fu for an hour. That was largely uneventful. I walked home (roughly an hour), stopping off to buy groceries for dinner that evening.

I got home at roughly 4:00pm. I had enough time to unpack the groceries, have a shower, dress and have a quick nap before the first guests for the WINE PARTY! arrived. Sorry. I get excited about seeing the two words "wine" and "party" together like that.

Can I just say, it was a brilliant evening, reserved only for my closest Kung Fu brother's and sisters (well, also my flatmate and my Kung Fu brother's most excellent girlfriend, S.D. who are welcome just by Wutan association). There was more wine than I knew what to do with - six bottles, all of which were new to us.

We took great care to hide the type and origin of the wine, and then we tried them all. We had a guide as to the colour, aromas and flavours and we wrote them all down, as well as giving the wines a score based on appeal. I have to say, P.B. is quite the expert when it comes to wines. I was duly impressed.

Later on, we played Balderdash. I won. By a long shot. I'm still rather chuffed about it.

Sunday was spent doing absolutely nothing at all. A little tidying after the party, then lounging around trying to find the will to keep my eyes open. CBC's Republic of Doyle helped with that a little. It's a great show about a Private Detective in Newfoundland. I'm now caught up with them all.

On that note, my lucky flatmate is off to see the star of Republic of Doyle on Thursday. He's having a sit down with his fans here in Ottawa. My friend entered the competition to attend, but didn't win. However, a friend's friend did win, and scored two tickets out of the deal. So no, J. M-B. is off to see Alan Hawko. I'm fully expecting a tonne of photos and the best stories ever.

I was so relaxed and happy all weekend that I totally forgot that I had something due no later than Sunday. I came into work Monday morning to find a reminder email waiting for me. Really, it was asking if I was going to hand in the damned thing or not. The "damned thing," by the by, were scores for a short story competition I was one of the judges for. Yeah. I'm a tool.

I am such an idiot.

I really hate being late with anything. It drives me up the wall, mostly because other people are depending upon things like this. Also, I'm almost never late. I have been known to show up half an hour early just to avoid being five minutes late.

This thing really bugged me.

I apologised profusely before spending yesterday morning judging. I handed it in that morning. I have to say, there were some high calibre stories this month!

Last night, I found out some pretty stressful news.

Cyclone Yasi.

As if Queensland didn't have enough natural disaster to deal with.

My family lives in the area expected to take the full brunt of the angry storm. The papers say that the coastal towns are being evacuated. I'm not sure if this is so. I haven't heard any plans from my family as to what they're going to do. I'm a little stressed. You can read this to find out why.

It's moments like these I hate being so far from my family.

And now we're at the end of my extremely long post. All that remains is today's Forgotten English word/phrase. Thus:

Mistresspiece:

A feminine masterpiece; after masterpiece. Compare French mâtresse pièce, the principal piece of a work; [1640s to early 1900s].

- Fir James Murray's New English Dictionary, 1908

Rosamund... being the mistress-piece of beauty in that Age.

- Thomas Fuller's History of the Worthies of England, 1662